This is a too much information blog post. If they make you come over all unneccesary then I suggest that you toddle off now as you will not like this.
Both Monty and Blossom were in the bath and I was in the kitchen emptying the dishwasher. Before you scorn in disgust Blossom was in a bath chair and the bathroom is downstairs directly off of the kitchen like it is in a lot of Victorian houses. So I was within earshot and only a few feet away.
I am emptying the dishwasher and I can hear Monty talking to his boats and Blossom making a noise that I can only compare to Shaggy on the song boombastic.
You know the one. Playing the song in your head? That grunty growly voice?
Mr lover lover....grunt....
Got it? Yes. That.
Odd I think to myself and pop my head round the door.
I am greeted by Monty sailing his boats through floating lumps of turd, totally unperturbed. Blossom just grins.
I scream, Monty suddenly clicks and starts shouting 'get it off me, get it off me, her plop is on me.'
Having no idea what to do first I grab him out of the bath and then grab Blossom, turn around to throw a towel around Monty and as I do Blossom finishes off what she started and proceeds to move about thus treading the offensive bodily function into the bath mat.
Gosh I knew Motherhood would be rewarding but no one told me it would be this glamorous!