Oh.My.Christ!!!

So I arrive at college yesterday evening, feeling the countdown - six weeks left of pregnancy, seven of college(whoops!)

But it's OK as I have handed in seven out of nine units, only two to go and they are nearly completed. Phew. All on track to complete the eighteen month course in eleven months. Smug me? A little! Proud of myself. OK a lot!

But wait, whats this ... a whole unit has had to be written off due to a technicality. Bum. Shit. Bollocks. Big Bollocks.


Lots of 'Oh my Christ' (to be said in the style of Pamela- you know Gavin's Mum in Gavin & Stacey) was internally said, as my tutor did her best to stop me going in to labour.

And in actual fact it's fine as I have another unit I can do that I already have most of the evidence completed due to my lovely tutor going through all my assessments and previous evidence and cross referencing it all.

So it's OK.

But it did get a bit OH.MY.CHRIST for a while there. Shheesh!





In other news, here is the bump!

Nesting is commencing like you would not believe, Pickles nursery is done,well decorated and nearing organisation. Prettifying has yet to commence but bunting has been ordered so do not worry, it will be a vision in Cath Kidston Strawberry print! Babygroes are washed and folded neatly in drawers and the moses basket is ready. I know at 34 weeks pregnant this may seem a bit nuts but Mo arrived at 37 weeks, contractions got under way at a police picnic with the husband and ALL his colleagues on Hove Lawns, our flat was full of boxes due to us moving when I would have been 39 weeks. This time round I am going to be ready with the precision of something very precise that I cannot think to compare to?

I have physio this morning for my SPD and carpel tunnel syndrome, which is good as I wake up with hands that feel like they have been to the dentist and hips that feel like they belong to a ninety year old break dancer (I'm sure there are are ninety year old break dancers. No? )

So we are nearly there, the home straight and I for one, am EXCITED!

I am really quite extremely very sorry, sort of.

This particular post is for my (long suffering) Husband.

I am sorry for the following things:

Leaving the interior light on in the car which then ran the battery down. And you had to walk to work. A long way. In the night.

Leaving the parking light on in the car. Which ran the battery down again. And you had to walk to work again. But at least we have jump leads now after the last time eh? (And I didn't even know what or where the parking light was so, well, so not really my fault?)

Changing rules. I am sorry for the new communal chocolate rule in the house. Where if it's your chocolate and you have left it I can eat it. But if it's my chocolate you can't. And if it's my chocolate and I can't finish it I hide it in the bathroom. But usually I do finish it. I know this must have made the bottom drop out of your world drop out as you were the chocolate addict in our house and now I get very animalistic over chocolate. I don't know what has happened to me. But it has, so get over it- touch my choc, feel my force. Ahem. Sorry .Again.

Bursting into tears over random things, like you coming back from picking Mo up from nursery and saying he wasn't talking to anyone on the lunch table. Tears.
The ad for the dogs trust home. Tears. And so on....

Ringing you from upstairs in bed as you watch TV to ask for rice cakes and cream cheese. I was watching 'Big bang theory'

Texting you from upstairs in bed to ask for an apple. I was watching 'How I met your Mother'

Making you do all manner of DIY 'before Pickle is born' and constantly adding to the list, you have decked the garden, decorated our bedroom, decorated Pickles nursery, put up pictures, put up mirrors etc etc etc. I'll leave you be now.

Falling into such a deep sleep after listening to my tums2mums mp3 that you were unable to move me,despite trying to lift,push and shove me across the bed and repeatedly saying my name. You thought you might have to sleep on the sofa. Whoops.Sorry about that. hehehehehe!

In the same vein I'm sorry that I we now resemble a silent night advert in bed. I am the hippo one and you are the duck one. I grunt and groan as I repeatedly have to turn over every 3.8 minutes. And beat my chest like a chimp because of heartburn. Can't be nice for you.

So, I am sorry for all these things.


BUT I am going to be having a baby very shortly and babies mean pushing presents.

If I could have flowers, champagne, pretty things and a maternity (eternity ring) that'd be fab.


Love you. xxx

Creative Crapping! Who knew?

My son has a skill.

It was one I was not prepared for. At all.

He can poo animals.

I don't mean he has eaten a plastic pig and it's made it's journey through his intestines. I mean he can dump in the image of living creatures.

I have wondered if I should start taking photo's and sharing with the world, or at least the world wide web, I mean someone burns their toast with the image of Jesus Christ and look at the buzz that got? But no, I realise that's a bit minging.

It started when he was first potty trained:

''Look Mummy I pooed a snake! I did it!''

Yeah yeah I thought, that is kind of a given. But since then, well he has excelled himself I kid you not. A whole array of creatures has been crapped.

We have had a frog- exact replica, a lion- it really looked like a, well a LION! A dragon that I could of sold to the Loch Ness Monster gift shop.

We have also had a perfect round gingerbread biscuit. With eyes. ( God bless granary seeded bread for authenticity!) That particular plop had to be shown to his Bobbops of course, Mo insisted on carrying his potty into the kitchen as my poor Nan and Grandad were eating spaghetti bolognaise for their dinner. Stupid thing is they were impressed and only marginally disgusted.

Sorry if your reading this while eating.

A private poo and a item of a personal nature.

Monty is doing really well with the depositing poo/wee in loo or potty lark.

He has impressed me no end.

So it came as no surprise when I lifted him onto the loo and he balanced on his plastic make loo hole smaller adaptor thingy when he said :

''Mummy go away, I call you when I done. OKAY!''

OK I thought, normal for him to start to want a bit of privacy. I waited outside for his call, which of course came, and trotted in to assume my 'duties.'


I found him on the loo, pants and trousers flicked off from his ankles, slippers still attached, chewing on a Tampax.

Makes no sense to me?

Where's my long haired boy gone???

So after much heel dragging we had decided to get Monty's hair cut. I was reluctant as I had become stupidly sentimental over his locks, the blonde, the curls.....weeeeep!
BUT we were also getting fed up of second glances from ignorant peons, and constantly having to say 'HE' to strangers as if it was the most ridiculous thing to imagine that Mo was a boy, who happened to have long hair.Also practicality wise, it was getting so knotty, and getting caught in his nose snot. Gross.


So here is his new barnet.



Cute stuff eh, and still longish and lovely.
What do you think eh? looking good Mo!

Paul Weller and a Marilyn Monroe wig!

Thanking you very much MUMMYTIPS for tagging me, and obviously Rosie Scribble for coming up with the meme in the first place. Tis a clever one and I likey!

The rules are..

1. Name a song that makes you happy - a song you would listen to if you needed a sudden injection of happiness;

2. Post an image that makes you smile. It can be anything - a silly photo, an image taken from the internet, It just has to make you smile. Like this. *Smiles at computor monitor, I know you can't see me but you have a visual image I bet?



Usually I ummm and ahhh over memes but as soon as I got this I knew exactly which song and image I was going to use.

So without further ado, here they are!



This is Monty in my Marilyn Monroe wig. I don't really need to add anything because it is obvious why this makes me smile, hell, LAUGH every time I look at it!

And then obviously being the Paul Weller nut that I am, this song always makes me feel on top of the world. Strange really as I was one year old when it was released! Of all the Paul Weller gigs I've been to, it is THE song that gets the crowd going every time. Which is so odd as most Jam fans hated The Style Council? I guess it's the string section, get's everyones hearts pumping?
Couldn't actually upload the vid but please click the link.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7m94ip38UKs


So, in the manner of meme,
I tag

new mummy tips
and
cafe bebe


Your it...GO!!!

Frock Me!!!

The lovely CLAIRE LANCASTER tagged me in this clever meme, the task is to get my wedding frock out!

I can't believe it's over four years since we got married, and SO much has happened since, Mr has become a Policeman, we have bought a flat, sold it, bought the victorian house of my dreams (well my dreams for now anyways!!) done it up (all bar the kitchen and bathroom) and not to forget Monty and our soon to be newest addition - Pickle!

Claire commented in her post as to whether she should sell her dress, I have had the same dilemma. On the one hand there is nearly £1000 worth of dress there. We could really use that money.

On the other, surely if I wanted to sell it I would have by now. Something is stopping me?

I am about to have a daughter, who is to say she won't have it customised and wear it, it'll be almost vintage by the time she may get married?

It doesn't take up that much space in my loft and it is beautifully packed in tissue paper to stop discolouration, in a flowery box with a big bow on it, to protect it , and errrr to look pretty?

And... it's MY dress?

What do you think? What have you done with yours?

And in the manner of meme,

I tag........


Tara at Sticky Fingers

and

Laura at Are we nearly there yet Mummy?

And if you are reading this and want to be tagged, the consider it done, just gimme a linky in your post?

Enjoy ladies!